


walking on gold rays

by sansrival



Category: PRISTIN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, F/F, sweet stuff d'awww
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-29
Updated: 2017-12-30
Packaged: 2019-02-23 10:22:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13188087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sansrival/pseuds/sansrival
Summary: They're different types of dreamers, but dreamers nonetheless, with the same hopes of realization.





	1. i got this feeling

**Author's Note:**

> title is a line from gold rays by the vinyl pinups. this is sort of a christmas gift i guess hehe happy holidays to everyone!

Yebin would very much consider herself to be a dreamer. She kind of has to be, when she's a seventeen-year-old girl who likes girls and can’t do much about it.

Besides, dreaming makes it easier to live through such a disappointing reality at least.

**...**

Heavenly, like the chime of bells, and sweet, like honey; it has Yebin’s ears pricking up in sudden interest as she halts in the middle of the empty hallway.

Her lips move on its own, silently synching with the familiar lyrics that she has listened to countless times before. It happens to be her favourite, after all.

Yebin lets herself follow the singing voice, taking tentative steps as she pays careful attention to where the strumming of guitar is coming from. Unsurprisingly, it leads her right to the music room. The door is wide open, letting the voice drift through the open space and flow down the hallway like a stream.

She peaks through the window, eyes barely past the frame. When she catches a glimpse of the songbird, Yebin thinks she can feel her eyes turning into hearts.

 

Now Yebin would be too shy to admit such sentimentality, but she can be quite the romantic too. She daydreams of young love and soft hands to hold, a voice that will sing her favourite songs to her and tuck her hair behind her ears when it falls over her eyes.

Her cheeks glow red just thinking about it.

But like glass shattering, snapping back to reality has the voice in her head reminding her that all her pipe dreams are exactly what they are: unattainable and unrealistic. Just a castle in the air.

Because the hands she pictures are slender and the voice is airy and light; sure, times may be changing, but liking girls is still not something she can share openly without worrying.

So she keeps her desires to herself. There are a lot of pretty girls at her school, but she knows better than to fall for any of them. _Love at first sight_ is one cliché Yebin can appreciate, but would never actually imagine herself in such a situation.

 

However, peeking through that window and seeing the long-haired girl sing like a nightingale, Yebin thinks she has fallen into one of her daydreams.

Because seeing the prettiest girl with the prettiest voice singing her favourite song all alone in a music room is something ordinary high school student Yebin didn’t think she’d ever experience.

Needless to say, she’s only an onlooker watching a spectacle play in front of her, not a girl on a balcony listening to a serenade. So when the girl in the room strums to end the song, Yebin holds back from bursting in and giving her a round of well-deserved applause.

Instead, she sneaks into the empty room across, waits for the girl to slip out of the music room before tiptoeing in. Scurrying over to where the guitar sits in the open case, Yebin leaves a note in her neatest handwriting for the girl to find.

She writes to the pretty stranger about how lovely and sweet her voice is and how it’s exactly what Yebin hears floating through her castle in the air.

Corny.

Yebin sneaks out before the girl returns.

**...**

With a browse of the yearbook, Yebin finds out that the pretty stranger’s name is Minkyung. She’s a year older, which makes Yebin sulk, for how could she grow an interest on a senior who’s already in her last year of high school? (It seems highly inconvenient…)

The presence of her smiling face on all the previous group pictures tells Yebin that Minkyung has been in the music club ever since her first year of high school. Yebin briefly wonders if it’s too late to join the music club…

She keeps her eye out for Minkyung whenever she’s at school. The junior and senior homerooms are at separate parts of the school, but Yebin takes the time to pass through the music hallway more often and sneak a peek in hopes of catching a glance at the pretty stranger.

Minkyung stays in the music room by herself everyday after school. Sometimes, Yebin hears her singing, other times she’s just playing guitar, and often times she’s studying quietly.

It differs everyday, but every time, Yebin always makes sure to leave a note for Minkyung. And it’s always compliments or some words of encouragement. She doesn’t stick around to see Minkyung find the notes in fear that she'll be found out, so Yebin can only hope that the girl is receiving them.

Sometimes, it worries her; does Minkyung even read them? Is all her effort going to waste? Is this only fulfilling for her? Is Minkyung annoyed?

One day, she finally gets her answer.

_‘You’re too sweet. Thank you for giving me strength! Whoever you are!’_

Written in neat, clear letters that has Yebin feeling sheepish over her own chicken scratch. A cute smiley face is doodled at the end of the message. The tips of Yebin’s lips reach her ears in a wide grin as she picks up the note Minkyung had left for her.

She hastily trashes her original note (with some mawkish words of motivation) and writes a new one on the spot.

_‘Hearing your voice energizes me after a tired day at school. Today, too, you’ve worked hard! Don’t forget to take breaks.’_

Yebin tacks on her own version of a smiley face and leaves the note on the guitar case. She rushes out before anyone else finds her in the room, clutching Minkyung’s note for her tightly in her palm.

**...**

The exchange of memos becomes regular.

For Yebin, it began with just motivating remarks and kind compliments to uplift the tired Minkyung, who Yebin knows is working hard preparing for college entrance exams and auditions.

For Minkyung, it began with simple words of gratitude and written chuckles as a show of her appreciation. And truth be told, she liked receiving such sweet words everyday anyways.

But as it became more recurrent with the passing weeks, those initial words faded into the background and there emerged real topics of conversations. They would exchange notes back and forth as if they were texting on KakaoTalk. Words have turned to slang. Formal speech has turned casual.

Yebin finds herself having full conversations on a regular basis with her crush. It’s fun, of course. Even if Minkyung doesn’t know who she is (and really, Yebin is amazed she hasn’t been caught), she leaves notes as if she’s been friends with Yebin for years.

Through all the note-passing, they learn about each other more intimately than Yebin ever has with a friend face to face.

She tells Minkyung of how she tends to rub her arms when she’s lying; Minkyung tells her it’s cute and that she’s a pretty good liar herself (with a cheeky wink drawn at the side).

Yebin writes to her about her favourite thing on the menu at the café across the school; Minkyung writes back with a promise that they should go there together one day.

Yebin tells her that her favourite song is ‘Lost Stars’; Minkyung tells her it's her favourite too (and when Yebin starts hearing Minkyung sing the song more often in the music room, she goes home grinning like an idiot every time).

Through all the note-passing, Yebin feels as if she’s falling deeper. How could such a perfect girl exist? And how amazing of a person was Yebin in her previous life that she deserves a blessing like this?

Yebin admits it’s corny, but Minkyung’s the absolute girl of her dreams; the one who would hold her hand and sing to her, tuck her hair behind her ear and lie with her in her castle in the air.

She saves all of Minkyung’s notes, tacking them onto the bulletin board in her bedroom that was supposed to be for school notes and reminders.

Yebin would much rather look up and see Minkyung’s cute messages on torn pieces of paper anyways. They gave her better motivation in studying than any silly encouraging notes she’s ever written for herself.

**...**

Kyungwon finds Minkyung staring starry-eyed at a piece of paper when she enters the music room.

She waves her hand in front of the girl. “Earth to Kim Minkyung?”

Minkyung’s head snaps up.

“What are you looking at?” Kyungwon asks, but doesn’t give Minkyung the chance to answer as she snatches the note from her hand and reads it out loud herself. “’ _I made you a mixtape with all the songs I listen to whenever I study. I hope they’ll help you focus! Hang in there.’”_

Minkyung audibly lets out a soft sigh as she looks up at her friend with a dopey smile.

Kyungwon, on the other hand, lets out a gruff snort. “A _mixtape_? Oh my god, it’s 2017. Do you even own a Walkman? I’m pretty sure cassette decks went extinct at the same time as dinosaurs.”

Minkyung rises from her seat and snatches the paper back with a _hmph_. “Shut up, it’s the sweetest thing ever.” She lets out another content sigh as she gazes at the note. “I’m charmed, Kyungwon. _Charmed_.”

“You don’t even know who it is.”

Minkyung frowns. “I know. That’s why _you_ ,” she pokes Kyungwon on the forehead, “will help me figure out who our Mr. Perfect here is.”

Kyungwon swats her finger away. “Can’t he just talk to you in person? Why does he have to leave notes like we’re living in a romantic drama?” she grumbles, “It’s cowardly, if you ask me.”

“You’re just jealous,” Minkyung tells her with a scoff. “No one’s leaving _you_ sweet notes.”

Kyungwon just replies with a grumble of words, but Minkyung makes out a ‘you’re _half_ right…’ in the barely inaudible mumble and breaks into laughter.

“To start, maybe it’s someone in the music club? They must know which one’s my guitar case because they always leave the notes there.”

“Hmm...Jihoon?”

Minkyung can’t hide the awfully honest grimace that forms on her face. “I hope not. I tower over him by like six whole centimetres. Not that I have anything against short people, they can be quite cute too...” she shrugs, "but he's not my type."

Her friend snorts as she swings a leg over a chair. “What about that guy you always work with for composition assignments?”

Minkyung dismisses him too with a shake of the head. “No, it can’t be him. I’m familiar with Seungkwan’s handwriting.”

“Ah! That junior who gave you a gift on pepero day last year!” Kyungwon claps her hands as if she just had a eureka moment.

“He moved…” Minkyung shudders at the thought of him, “and he was weird. He gave me a photograph of himself.”

Kyungwon scrunches her nose. “This won’t do. Every boy in the music club probably likes you,” she groans, sinking further into the chair before suddenly jumping up again. “I have an idea. We have to catch them red-handed. Sometimes they leave notes just after the last bell, right? We just have to get to the music room earlier.”

Minkyung gives her good friend an approving nod as they exchange high-fives. “I don’t know how I didn’t think of that earlier, but this is why two brains are better than one.”

**...**

Yebin’s whistling, note in hand, as she catches a glimpse at the clock. She has about ten minutes before Minkyung arrives at the music room. It’s cutting it close– usually, she’s much earlier just to be safe– but she heard the seniors were being held up by a meeting so perhaps she can afford to be a bit late today.

But nearing the open door to the music room, Yebin comes to a halt when she hears two voices inside. A quick peak has her seeing Minkyung with a short-haired girl fooling around with some drums.

Yebin tiptoes away from the door and scurries away.  _Bad timing_...

**...**

Yebin pins another ‘ _Ca_ _n’t you tell me who you are?’_ note from Minkyung on her bulletin board with a sigh. It’s the third one that’s been left for her and again, for the third time, it goes unanswered.

**...**

This time, Yebin approaches the music room tentatively, clutching a new note in her palm. She quickens her pace a bit when she hears nothing but silence in the hallway.

Suddenly, a pair of footsteps fade into her attention and Yebin whips her head around just in time to see Kyungwon and Minkyung scurry past her in a hurry, her shoulder brushing with the latter. Yebin slows down in surprise. 

“Quick, we might catch them if they’re in the room right now!” she hears Kyungwon whisper to Minkyung as the two disappear into the corner, completely oblivious to the short girl they just ran past.

Yebin widens her eyes as she spins on her heels immediately, walking away from the direction of the music room.

_Not today either..._

**...**

‘ _How about a hint? What does your last name start with?’_

Every time Minkyung asks her such questions, Yebin always tries to give Minkyung a response that dances around them.

‘ _Isn’t this more fun if we don’t know?’…‘I’m embarrassed to show you my face, you’re too pretty’…’What if I’m not your style? Maybe you won’t like me like I like you.’_

Sometimes, she’s tempted to just completely expose herself, admit that ‘yes, my name is Kang! Ye! Bin! Class 2-3! Student number twelve! Kang Yebin from Ilsan!’.

It's especially tempting when Minkyung would leave her with replies like, _‘I want to see you’…’I get shy if you say things like that. Such a sweet person like you shouldn’t be embarrassed’…‘Hey, you are completely my style’_ (with ‘ _completely’_ underlined in red pen – that one had Yebin smiling her entire way home until her cheeks hurt).

But Yebin stops herself every time because just as she starts to revel in her dreams, the disenchanting reality reels her back whenever she strays too far away from it. And _reality_  comes in the form of Minkyung herself, ironically, and a certain word that she writes.

It’s only one word, but Yebin hates seeing it so much that she scratches it out every time before putting the notes up on her board:

_Boys._

Yebin groans every time she sees it. It sticks out like a sore thumb in her eyes – a wilting flower in a field of blooming vivid petals, ruining everything around it. But Minkyung tosses the word around so freely, threatening to spoil the garden like an oblivious pest.

_‘...All the unattractive boys in this school don’t seem like the sentimental type that you are...’_

_‘...There aren’t a lot of boys who can charm me, you know...’_

_‘...I’ll only tell you my ideal type of man if you tell me your ideal type first! Do I fit the description? Haha...’_

Yebin likes girls so much that just seeing that word annoys her. But who can she blame other than herself? Minkyung doesn’t even know her. Yebin sees it as her fault for falling for a straight girl anyways. 

Minkyung doesn’t need to know who she is. It’s better this way: anonymous and free of judgement.

But when Minkyung’s notes increasingly press her with questions and requests to unveil her identity, Yebin eventually grows tired of trying to misdirect them.

So one day, Yebin just stops.

She folds the new blue stationery from Minkyung (‘ _why are you so secretive? Just once, I’d like to see you, even for a second_ ’), tucks it into her pocket, and leaves the room quietly without leaving a new note.

**...**

“If you don’t stop pouting, your lips will permanently look like that.”

Minkyung lifts her head from the desk to look at Kyungwon directly. “They haven’t replied in nearly a week. Do you think they went somewhere? No, he would’ve told me if he went somewhere…”

“Did you do something to upset them?”

“I don’t know,” Minkyung sighs as she directs her gaze to the group of boys playing in the field outside. “Hey, do you think it’s a soccer player? Maybe he’s too busy playing to leave me notes. Ah, look at them play in such cold weather…It’s autumn already. I’m worried about him.”

Kyungwon grimaces and hits her on the arm. “Stop before I throw up. You’re acting as if you know he’s really a soccer player… And since when did you get so gross and…and… _in love_?”

“Hey!” Minkyung whips her head to face her, expression contorted in embarrassed disbelief, “who said I was in love?!”

“ _I_ did. If you’re not, then quit acting like you are,” Kyungwon shakes her head. “I’m surprised you even have time to think about dating when we’re third years. You should be busier than I am! High school is supposed to be brutal. The depictions on dramas are all fake! Romance doesn’t exist here. We’re supposed to study until we drop dead.”

Minkyung rolls her eyes at Kyungwon’s barrage of attacks. “Don’t be so cynical. Unlike you, I can balance my priorities. Let me enjoy myself, I gotta have fun too…”

Kyungwon blinks at her before reaching over to give her friend a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. “Fine, fine, our lovely Minkyung deserves her fun for all her hard work too. Go find your _Mr. Perfect_ or whatever. Don’t spend Christmas alone like me.”

Minkyung lets out a chuckle as her eyes drift back to the window. She can only faintly hear the rest of her classmates file into the classroom. It all sounds like just a distinct murmur. The uneasiness in the pit of her stomach returns.

**...**

“Good afternoon, friends. Happy lunch time. The following song was requested along with a special message, so listen carefully,” comes a voice from the school speakers, “' _I miss talking to you. Please write back'_.”

A short pause follows the announcer’s voice, static, and then the strumming at the beginning of ‘Lost Stars’ plays over the PA system.

And just like all those weeks ago when Yebin first heard the same familiar chords playing from the music room, her ears prick up in sudden interest. She comes to a halt in the hallway as other students run past her towards the cafeteria.

Yebin can’t resist the smile spreading on her face. The heat climbs up her neck, to her cheeks, up until the shell of her ears are red too. She braces herself over a window sill, humming along to Adam’s sweet voice and bringing her hands up to shield her cheeks. If she grows any redder, people might think she drank alcohol.

Yebin feels like swooning. Her castle in the air has been too awfully close to the ground lately.

**...**

Kyungwon laughs when she hears the message broadcasted over the PA system for everyone in the school to hear.

“You’re so corny,” she says to Minkyung.

Minkyung sticks her tongue out. “Shut up.”

She smiles to herself.

**...**

_‘You miss me? I knew you were a romantic.’_

Minkyung quietly squeals to herself in the empty music room upon seeing the new piece of paper on top of her guitar case. Her message worked on the mysterious note writer.

She eagerly grabs her guitar and begins practicing with a smile on her face. Her fingers move on their own and she plays each chord of her audition song effortlessly in the absence of sheet music. 

The euphoria of falling– admiration– evaporates any feelings of tiredness from her. She hasn't experienced anything like this _ever_. 

Minkyung thinks she can get used to this.

**...**

She blinks at the boy in the soccer uniform in front of her. He had a ball tucked under one arm and a practice bag hanging off the other shoulder.

“What?” she re-iterates.

“I like you. Didn’t you say you missed talking to me?”

“…It’s you?” Minkyung asks.

He grins at her, eyes turning into crescents. “Do you want to practice together? I want to hear you sing. Up close, this time.”

Minkyung breaks into an earnest smile, her heart swelling.

**...**

It’s not the first time Yebin has heard two voices coming from the music room on her way there, but it is the first time hearing a male voice.

They sing in perfect harmony, like two birds perched on a branch at dawn.

Yebin doesn’t like being petulant, but she can’t hold back the frown forming on her lips when she peeks just over the window ledge and sees Minkyung singing ‘Lost Stars’ with a boy Yebin has never seen before.

It seems like a trivial thing, but Yebin’s always considered it to be _their_ song, as in hers and Minkyung’s only. It feels weird seeing her sing _their_ song with someone else. Yebin doesn’t like the knot forming in her stomach very much.

She turns around and walks away without leaving a new note. Yebin knows she has skipped too many days with her notes, but she’s used to it by now.

**...**

Much to Yebin’s misfortune, the music room that day didn’t turn out to be the last time she’d see Minkyung and the boy again.

Nowadays, she sees them walking down the hallways together, always caught up in lively conversation. Sometimes, they sit together at the cafeteria and eat on their own, always sharing food. Other times, Yebin would catch Minkyung watching from the stands by the soccer field, always with a water bottle in hand to readily give to the same boy every time he broke off from playing with his friends.

It only hits Yebin one day on her way to the music room, when she sees them leave the room hand in hand. As they pass her, Yebin could only catch a tidbit of their conversation; it seems like they were heading to the café across the school, the same one Minkyung had promised Yebin _they’d_ visit together in a written note. 

Yebin would be lying if she admitted she didn’t feel a pang in her chest every time she saw them together with bright smiles on their faces. She likes Minkyung, after all. She finally had a face for the pretty girl in her dreams, but she can no longer daydream in peace without the boy invading all of her thoughts and taking Minkyung away just before she'd tuck hair behind Yebin's ear or hold her hand. 

Even if Minkyung may not know what Yebin looks like, they _know_ each other. They do. 

But she doesn’t do anything. It’s not her place to intrude; Yebin’s not a homewrecker. So she stops the note-writing. Minkyung doesn’t leave notes for her either, nor does Yebin hear any more ‘Lost Stars’ playing on the school speakers with a special message just for her.

Yebin takes this as the opportunity to finally move on. Perhaps she shouldn’t have started it in the first place. She blames herself for falling for a straight girl anyway.

_How could I be so impulsive? I should’ve seen this coming. She’d never truly like me._

**...**

“Man, you’ve got it _good_.”

“How’d you do it?”

“You chased after her for a year and finally! Wow. She’s the prettiest girl in our whole damn year, Seokmin!”

“How can you score both on and off the field? It’s not fair.”

The boys’ rowdy exchange down the hallway has Yebin wanting to bang her head against her books. With her notes sprawled on the floor in front of her, she just wanted some quiet study time out in the hallway before the bell rings.

“Eh, it was _nothing_ ,” she hears the boy say to his noisy friends. Yebin looks up to see that it’s him; the dragon who snatched Minkyung from Yebin’s castle in the air.

She grimaces. The name _Seokmin_ always left an unpleasant taste on her tongue. What does Minkyung see in him anyways? Other than the fact that he has a nice singing voice, a charming eye smile, and is a star soccer player known by everyone in the school– _well, he’s not_ that _amazing…_ she thinks.

“What can I say? She fell for my charms, that’s all,” he says smugly. Yebin visibly shudders to herself. _Gross._

“She looks at you like you just bought her an island. Can’t you tell me your secret to winning her over? I could use some tips…” one boy says and winces when the others hit him on the back in laughter.

“You sound real pathetic.”

“It wasn’t hard. She already liked me, I could tell,” Seokmin replies. And Yebin rolls her eyes so hard, she feels like she can see the inside of her head. “I found out her favourite song. But you guys wanna know the real secret?”

From the corner of her eye, Yebin sees him lean closer to his friends, but he doesn’t make much of an effort to be discrete with his words.

“Someone was leaving notes for her. I would see them on her guitar case. I don’t know who it was, but I told her it was me. She thinks I’m the sweetest guy she’s ever met,” he smirks. 

Yebin freezes.

“What kind of notes?”

He shrugs. “Nice ones,” then he breaks into a laugh. “I could tell... Someone else in this school has got it _bad_. Like, completely head over heels for her.”

“What the hell, man? You took credit for it? Won't she kill you if she finds out?!”

“Hey! I just saw my chance and took it. Don’t blame me, I’ve liked her for a year. If this guy _really_ liked her as much as I did, he should’ve just talked to her in person. Not my fault he’s a coward,” he scoffs. “She won’t find out. She likes me. And I didn't have to find the guy either, he just stopped leaving notes himself. Lucky for me. It made things _real_ easy.”

Yebin’s jaw tenses. Gathering all of her notebooks from the floor, she gets on her feet and stomps away. She couldn’t listen any longer.

**...**

It was completely impulsive, perhaps even selfish, of Yebin to leave Minkyung a note so out of the blue, especially since it’s been days since they stopped writing. But Minkyung doesn’t deserve to be lied to.

Yebin makes her handwriting clear.

_‘It’s not me. The boy you’re with.’_


	2. a feeling that i can't shake

Yebin considers herself lucky to witness the outcome of her actions during lunchtime the next day because it turns out to be quite an entertaining spectacle.

She was just enjoying her gimbap when she spots Minkyung entering the cafeteria and stomping right up to the group of rowdy boys sitting a few tables away from her.

"Hey!" her voice nearly reverberates, catching the attention of several surrounding tables. Yebin straightens in her seat as she too looks on in curiosity. 

Minkyung stands tall at the end of the table, glaring down at the very boy Yebin just saw her smiling with yesterday. "You lied to me! All this time?!” she exclaims, "You told me it was you, but it wasn’t. What the hell is wrong with you?!”

Minkyung scoffs and Yebin drops her gimbap when she sees her note held tightly in one of Minkyung’s clenched fists. All the boys at the table halt their conversations immediately as they glance at each other, wide-eyed like a couple of terrified tarsiers. Yebin thinks it's slightly amusing, actually. 

Suddenly, Seokmin, the uneasiest of them all, jumps up to his feet and grabs Minkyung by the wrist as he looks around cautiously. “Can we not do this here right now? Come with me...”

But Minkyung promptly pulls away from his grasp. Her virulent glare turns into a look of pity that has the tall Seokmin feeling humiliatingly small.

“You should put all the time you spend deceiving girls into studying instead. You need to anyway, if you think you even have a chance of passing the entrance exams and getting into any university with your current grades,” she spits, poison rolling off her tongue. Yebin watches in awe. “Don’t contact me. I don't want to see you anymore.”

Minkyung stomps out of the cafeteria. The tense aura leaves with her and the attention she had garnered with her show only lasts momentarily, the hushed whispers dissipating soon after. The students continue their eating and chatting, as if nothing happened, but surely, the whole spectacle will garner some new gossip around the school. Yebin sees Seokmin running after her. He's got a lot of damage control to do.

And then just like that, a bubble bursts. Yebin stares at her gimbap. She doesn’t know if she did the right thing or not. Besides, Minkyung _did_ look genuinely happy with him, even if Yebin wouldn’t like to admit it. And perhaps he was even a nice guy, aside from the fac-

_No, of course I did the right thing…he was lying to her the entire time! It wasn’t right._

**...**

Out of curiosity, Yebin drops by the music room after the last bell rings. She prayed she wouldn’t find Minkyung crying her eyes out.

Luckily for her, she doesn’t. (Or maybe Minkyung’s just crying elsewhere…Yebin shakes her head from the thoughts. It saddens her to think about it.)

Instead, Yebin finds a new note that Minkyung has left for her.

_‘I’m sorry for asking this, but it’ll be the last time. Will you tell me who you are?’_

Yebin frowns. She turns the note over and pulls out a pen from her backpack.

 _‘Sorry’_ is all she scrawls. Yebin leaves the note where she had found it and scurries out of the room.

**...**

Those were the last notes they left for each other.

Or so Minkyung thought.

But the mysterious note-writer remains mysterious.

It's been weeks since they last wrote to each other. This was the longest they had gone without leaving notes, so Minkyung had already accepted the fact that that was it. They were over.

Her mind has already been occupied by other things; namely, her screening the next day. The big audition she has been preparing for for months is finally on the horizon. The next years of her life rest on it; if she doesn’t pass her audition and get into university, then Minkyung doesn’t know what she’ll do. She doesn’t prepare to fail. _No pressure.._. She takes a deep breath.

With jitters and a thumping heart, rehearsing lyrics and running guitar chords in her head over and over again, the last thing Minkyung had been expecting to see when she entered the music room to grab her guitar was a new note.

And more than a piece of paper too. She also finds a small bottle of honey water and a ginseng drink.

 _‘Good luck. You will do amazing on your audition, I know it. You’ve worked hard. Take care of your throat,’_  it reads, in the handwriting Minkyung has grown so familiar to. 

Minkyung’s heartbeat remains unsteady, but for an entirely different reason. She feels the worries leave her body like escaping steam from a boiling kettle.

She saves the note and tucks it in her guitar case.

**...**

“Stop calling me, I have three assignments left to mark.”

“ _God_ , Minkyung, it’s been weeks since your audition and it’s almost Christmas! Are you gonna work until you drop dead?” Kyungwon tells her over the phone.

“Weren’t _you_ the one who told me that as seniors, we’re supposed to work hard until we drop dead?” Minkyung muses.

There’s a short silence from the other end. “…Well, everybody needs a break.”

Minkyung chuckles. “I’ll call you later. I promise you we’ll do karaoke sometime this week, okay? Now bye! Don’t call me again!” She hangs up before Kyungwon could even say a word.

She resumes her marking. Minkyung had volunteered to help the music teacher for some extra credit in hopes that it would better her chances of getting into her university of choice. Marking assignments is a hassle, but if it will help, then Minkyung won’t hesitate to spare a few hours reading through the messy scrawls of second years.

Just as her eyes are about to drop close in tiredness, a certain assignment catches her full attention immediately and jolts her awake.

Minkyung flips through the pages, scanning the handwriting in haste. It looks awfully familiar. As if a lightbulb had switched on in her head, she reaches down to where her guitar sits and grabs the note she had tacked on in the inside of her case.

She looks at the last good luck note she had received and then back at the assignment. Her eyes jump back and forth. The letters are nearly identical. _Could it be…?_

When she flips to the last page of the assignment and reads the first line, Minkyung’s suspicions are confirmed.

_‘Another song of relevance is a favourite of mine. “Lost Stars” by Americ...’_

Minkyung quietly gasps. She hurriedly turns back to the front page, her eyes shooting to the top of the paper to see who the assignment belongs to.

And there she sees it; scrawled hastily with black pen, the name jumps out in clarity amidst the sea of letters written in pencil.

In a hushed voice, Minkyung murmurs the name to herself.

“Kang Yebin.”

**...**

The door to her homeroom slides open and the class quiets at the entrance of a visitor. When Yebin sees who it is, she immediately freezes.

“Hello sir!" Minkyung greets the music teacher with a bright grin. "Here are the assignments. They were so well done, I was wondering if I could return them to the students personally?”

Yebin sinks further into her seat as her eyes widen in realization.

 _She was the one who marked our assignments?!_  She panics for a second, trying to remember if she possibly wrote anything embarrassing about herself. But just as Minkyung starts calling out the names of her classmates, the _real_ worry hits Yebin like a train.

 _…She couldn’t have possibly recognized my handwriting, could she?_ Yebin begins tapping her pencil in nervousness as she watches Minkyung at the front of the class hand back papers one by one. _No, it’s been weeks, maybe she forgot about it…there’s no way she can recognize my terrible chicken scratch…relax Yebin, relax…everything will be fine, don't freak ou-_

“Kang Yebin?” 

Yebin whips her head to the front of the class at her name being called and sees Minkyung scanning the room. She gives herself a swift kick in the pants before cautiously standing from her desk and scurrying to the front of the room.

**...**

Minkyung gets to the final assignment in her stack. She had saved it for last.

“Kang Yebin?” she calls out amongst the murmur of the students.

And finally, after months, she sees the note writer.

Finally, she has a face to match all the sweet words she has received, the compliments and the gifts that were often the only bright parts of her busy day; the source of her energizing motivation and innocent happiness.

The (much shorter) girl keeps her head down the entire time. Yebin receives her assignment with both hands.

“Good job,” Minkyung tells her as she looks intently at the girl in front of her.

Yebin simply bows her thanks and immediately scurries back to her desk like a mouse. It was such a short interaction, over in the blink of an eye, that Minkyung could barely register that it happened before the music teacher's voice ushers her out of the room. 

She throws back one last glance before leaving. 

_So it’s you, huh?_

**...**

“So it’s you.”

Yebin feels her knees going weak when she whips her head around and sees who is talking to her.

“You’re the note writer,” Minkyung says.

She towers over Yebin, who has to lift her chin just to look her in the eyes. Luckily, Yebin would much rather stare at everything _but_ Minkyung anyways. The girl's even prettier up close; Yebin doesn't believe she'd be able to think straight if she looked at Minkyung directly. 

 “W-what? I…I'm sorry? I don’t know- I'm not sure what you’re talking about,” Yebin stammers as she stares at the ground.

“It was you left me all the notes, wasn’t it?”

“Um, I think you’re mistaking me for someone else, sunbaeni-“

“It _is_ you,” Minkyung cuts her off, “You’re rubbing your arm. You do that when you lie.”

Yebin freezes. She looks at her arms and lo and behold, there’s her left hand, rubbing her right arm without her even realizing. She shuts her eyes.

_Goddamnit, Kang Yebin! You’re an idiot! A whole dummy!_

But she'd admit that a part of her swells too and a butterfly flutters its wings in her stomach at the thought of Minkyung remembering such a detail about her. Yebin's lips quirk a bit and she ducks her head when Minkyung tries to look her in the eyes.

Yebin stares at their feet, eyes trained on Minkyung’s white sneakers as if she’d just magically walk away if Yebin stared long enough.

Instead, Minkyung stays put. “You’re a lot bolder in the notes, you know,” she says. If Yebin could muster up the courage to look at her in the face, she’d see the amusement painted on Minkyung’s pretty features.

Yebin shuffles on her feet. “Well, they were…anonymous, s-so…”

When Minkyung doesn’t say anything, Yebin lifts her chin a bit to catch a glance at the older girl. Unfortunately for Yebin, that was a mistake.

Because she finds Minkyung looking at her with such a painfully unreadable expression that makes the question she asks all the more ambiguous: “…Did you mean everything you said in those notes?”

Yebin looks away immediately, fiddling with the cuffs of her uniform blazer instead. A thousand worries flash in her mind.  _Is she disgusted? Angry? Disappointed? She must be disappointed..._

Before she could make up another lame and completely unconvincing excuse, a ringing sound cuts them off – saved by the bell.

Yebin breathes a sigh of relief and takes this as the opportunity to escape. Bowing her goodbye, she quickly scurries off to save herself from further embarrassment.

Minkyung doesn’t even bother calling after her.

**...**

"Has Seokmin stopped bothering you?"

"Who?"

Kyungwon snickers at Minkyung's reply. "That's what I like to hear. I know you're probably not interested, but I just think this is funny. He's been rejected by someone at another school. Seems like word of what happened to you spread to other schools too. Poor guy...nah, I don't really feel sorry for him."

"He's getting the brunt of it, but I'm embarrassed I ever fell for it in the first place," Minkyung says with a sigh, "Whatever." 

“Still nothing on your audition results yet?”

Minkyung shakes her head. “It usually takes them a while. I think I did pretty well though.” She smiles at the note on her guitar case.

Suddenly, she straightens her back. “Oh yeah…she’s a girl.”

“Huh? Who?”

Minkyung grabs the note and holds it up to Kyungwon. “The note writer.”

Kyungwon blinks for a few seconds, eyes shifting from the note to Minkyung, before suddenly bursting into laughter. “Wait, really?! Oh my god. I don’t know why we never considered that…” She looks down to see Minkyung staring wordlessly at the note. “So? How do you feel?”

Minkyung only gives her an unsure shrug. “I don’t know…dumbfounded? It kind of left me in a daze when I found out. But then I saw her and…she’s kind of cute?” She shakes her head and shrugs again. “I don’t know.”

Her friend raises an eyebrow. “You like girls?”

In a second, Minkyung snaps her head up. “What? No!” she exclaims before her eye catches the good luck message Yebin had written for her. “I mean…I don’t think so. But I don’t think I’d take back anything I said to… _her_ in those notes either…”

“Hm. Then maybe you do like girls.”

“But I’ve always liked boys!”

“You can like both. It’s called being bisexual,” Kyungwon rolls her eyes like it’s obvious. “Or maybe you just like _one_ girl?” A wink this time and Minkyung feels like hitting her in the back of the head.

Instead, she just shrugs for the umpteenth time and resumes to staring at the note.

It’s her that ends up getting hit by a hand. Minkyung winces when Kyungwon slaps her on the back.

“Why do you look like you’re glitching out? Relax. It’s not a crime to be a girl and like a girl,” Kyungwon says with an amused snort. "Don't seem so scared."

"I'm not!"

Imagining her future, Minkyung has never pictured herself with a girl. It’s a situation she has barely entertained, but never pursued any further. Minkyung would think of herself as a dreamer too – but they were always realistic ambitions and reachable goals, not castles in the air nor pipe dreams.

A nice suite in a high rise in Seoul. Children. A stable job, perhaps teaching music. Married. But who says she can’t imagine herself with a girl?

Kyungwon pulls her out of her reverie. “Figure out your feelings. Now come on, there’s a new meal deal at the chicken place and I’m _starving,_ I could eat a horse.”

She grabs Minkyung by the arm and pulls her out of her seat. Minkyung’s eyes don’t stray away from her guitar case until it leaves her sight completely.

**...**

There are three open textbooks in front of her and six pencils sprawled all over the desk. Yebin is supposed to be studying, but instead, she sits resting her head on the back of her seat, staring at the textured finish on the ceiling.

Her mind races. _Is it possible for the earth to swallow me right now? What are the chances of a sinkhole opening up right beneath me? What is the furthest country from South Korea that I can move to? How much is a plane ticket to Jeju-_

“There you are!”

The sudden interruption of her thoughts has Yebin lifting her head. She finds a tall girl marching towards her table in the far corner of the library. Yebin looks around with bewildered wide eyes.

_Wait, is she talking to me? Was she looking for me? Wh-_

Minkyung arrives at her table far sooner than Yebin had expected. The shorter girl straightens up her posture immediately in surprise. 

“Are you hungry? Let’s go to the café across the school.”

Yebin swallows when she gapes at the taller girl standing over her. Minkyung’s impossibly pretty; Yebin already knows this, but the older girl never fails to leave her with nothing to say. Moreover, her gaze towards Yebin has her squirming in her seat to draw attention away from her flushing cheeks.

“W-why?” Yebin stammers. Minkyung had caught her completely off-guard.

Minkyung just cocks her head. “Don’t you know you shouldn’t decline if an upperclassman offers you food? Besides, we all need a break from this studying.”

Yebin’s stomach decides to betray her right at that moment with a rumbling growl that surely echoed in the library. She flinches. Is this what it feels like to be checkmated and backed into a corner?

**...**

Yebin keeps her mouth shut the entire way there. She’s not usually so shy and quiet around people, but here she was, trailing behind Minkyung’s footsteps in the snow in utter silence. 

Minkyung orders for her (leaving Yebin too astonished at the fact that Minkyung remembers her favourite on the menu) and finds them a table. The entire time, Yebin just follows after her like some obedient puppy.

Needless to say, what’s happening– whatever it is– hasn’t really hit Yebin yet. She had her daydreams, but this is the closest she’s ever gotten to them coming true. Yebin never really prepared herself because what were the chances? They were pipe dreams after all. 

“I’ve never tried the Americano here, but it’s nice to drink in the winter.”

Minkyung starts conversing with her as if they’re old friends. Yebin tries her best to keep up and despite it being challenging at first, Minkyung has an amazing knack of getting her to loosen up.

"Are you always in the library?"

“The study room is always filled up so I stay in the library,” Yebin admits. "And I guess being surrounded by books helps."

“You’re free to join me in the music room if you’d like,” Minkyung tells her with a soft smile. When Yebin lets a dumb giggle slip out of her mouth, she shuts herself up with a sip of her drink.  

Yebin doesn’t even realize the ease of their conversation until Minkyung hits her with the topic they had been dancing around ever since they sat down.

“You like me. And you’re a girl. Is that why you didn’t want to admit who you were?”

Yebin’s smile disappears as she looks down at her drink. It had already gotten cold. She shifts uneasily in her seat.

“I’m sorry. I would've, but it seems like you like boys and truthfully, I didn't want to end what we had going on... I know you must’ve been surprised…” she admits bashfully. When she spares a quick glance at the girl in front of her, Yebin finds that Minkyung’s easygoing smile has been replaced by an unreadable expression.

She nervously takes a sip because Minkyung doesn’t look mad, but she doesn’t look ecstatic either and Yebin doesn’t know how to feel, but she doesn’t feel too good about where this is going.

“I was. I've never liked girls,” Minkyung finally says and Yebin hopes her wince wasn’t too obvious. _Ouch…alright, that one stung…_

Yebin just nods and takes another sip, wondering what on earth she’s even doing here and why she ever agreed to this in the first place. What is Minkyung trying to achieve by dragging her out here if she doesn’t feel the same way? If it’s a friendship, Yebin would readily pass; she already knows she can’t just _be friends_ with the girl she likes. Isn’t it even worse if Minkyung knows it too?

"Aren't you worried about what other people think?"

Yebin blinks. She's never thought of it because no one  _knows_ anyways. "No, not really," she decides with a slight shrug. "I don't care. It's not their business. I like who I like."

"But you seemed worried about what I thought."

Yebin opens her mouth before closing it again. Minkyung doesn't waver once with her ambiguous gaze.

"I...t-that's because I like you," Yebin murmurs.

Minkyung just hums in reply, breaking her gaze and concentrating on the falling snow outside. Yebin concludes in her head that she needs to cut ties and she needs to do it _quick_ before she falls any deeper than she already has. Perhaps Minkyung isn't meant to be the girl in her daydreams after all. 

“Um, this was fun, sunbaenim, thank you for the drink. But I need to go back to the school...”

“Okay.”

Minkyung lets her go too easily and Yebin would be lying if she admitted that she wasn’t surprised. She tries to ignore the knot in her stomach as she stands up and bows a goodbye.

**...**

Minkyung offers to walk her back and Yebin wants to decline, if only she had the will to do so. But a heavy heart is too tiring to budge.

It _especially_ doesn’t help when Minkyung asks her if she’s cold and offers her a heat pack; when Minkyung’s gentle hand pulls her away from the curb she had been standing too close to, muttering a “ _be careful”_ when a car zooms by; when Minkyung walks _with_ her instead of ahead of her.

Yebin feels like she’s dreaming.

_How can she be so perfect? No…stop it Yebin, you’re not supposed to like her anymore! She doesn’t like you! She doesn’t-_

Again, Minkyung unknowingly halts Yebin’s train of thought like a massive boulder falling right on the tracks.

“So will you let me take you out again? When are you free?” Minkyung asks her.

Yebin abruptly comes to a stop. “Huh? But why?”

Minkyung blinks as if Yebin’s question had caught her off guard. “Um, well, I want to get to know you more. It’s weird because I feel like we already know everything about each other,” Minkyung chuckles and Yebin thinks she might pass out right then and there, “but at the same time…I feel like we don’t.”

It’s tempting, _of course_ it’s tempting. Yebin wants to jump on the opportunity immediately, just yell _yes! Take me wherever your heart desires!_ But she holds herself back and shuffles on her feet hesitantly. Yebin’s aware of the slippery slope she’s on.

But she’s awfully transparent and Minkyung doesn’t miss Yebin’s uncertain bite on her own bottom lip. So she says what's been brewing on her mind in separate pieces, only coalescing now, ever since she saw Yebin.

“I think I like you.”

Yebin’s head shoots up to look at her so quick, she almost gets whiplash. “W-what?”

The look on Minkyung’s face is a new one; it’s more earnest this time, a tad bit curious, as if there were twinkling stars in her eyes. It’s the most discernible she’s been all day and Yebin really can’t believe this is even happening. Did Minkyung just confess to her?

“But…” Yebin murmurs, “you don’t even like girls.”

“I didn’t think so, but,” Minkyung pauses and then she chuckles, “you’re a girl. And I realized I wouldn’t take back anything I wrote in my notes to you, right down to the confessions. That’s got to mean something, right? All your notes were heartwarming, but your good luck note just before my screening…it helped me tremendously during the audition.”

This time, it’s Minkyung who’s looking down at the floor, fingers fiddling with one another. It's a bashful sight Yebin never expected to see.

“I’d like to think you were my lucky charm,” Minkyung admits.

And then the tips of her lips turn up in a sweet smile as she finds Yebin’s eyes.

The shorter girl just blinks at her, speechless (Yebin’s currently malfunctioning, you see), so Minkyung takes in her silence and keeps talking, hoping Yebin is processing everything she’s saying.

“I know that I shouldn’t be afraid and hold back. I like finding out new things about myself and truthfully, this might just be my favourite one yet. Because I got to meet you. I guess the heart wants what it wants,” she says with a cheeky smile and, as if on cue, Yebin begins blushing madly. Minkyung chuckles at her reddening ears. “The universe has a funny way of working itself out, doesn’t it?”

“Of course…" Yebin can only mutter in half a daze, "it keeps life interesting."

“Yeah, that’s right,” Minkyung grins before an apologetic look sweeps over her face, “Um, I’m sorry if I was a bit ambiguous today–“ (‘ _a bit’ is an understatement…_ Yebin thinks), “–I was just trying to figure out my feelings. I hope you can forgive me for that.”

_I’ll forgive you in a heartbeat._

Yebin pinches herself, but doesn’t find herself jolting awake in a classroom. It feels like she’s walking on clouds, but she looks down and sees the pavement beneath the thin layer of snow, feels the ground beneath her boots.

"You're pretty cool, Kang Yebin. You're thoughtful and sweet and the way you write your  _bieup_ is cute. You have the best taste in music. What can I say? You know the way to a girl's heart."

Minkyung quirks an eyebrow as the tip of her lips lift in a small smirk.

Quite belatedly, Yebin suddenly realizes that she can’t just stand there with her mouth open and looking like a fish out of the water when the prettiest girl in school is looking at her expectantly. She has to say something, _anything_. This is her chance.

“You know how I feel about you. I like you too.”

Unexpectedly, her voiced out confession has Minkyung smiling the brightest Yebin has ever seen. Even though she already knew, she bites her lip to hold back a grin as if she had been waiting for it. And just seeing that has Yebin’s heart swelling ten times bigger.

“So yes, you’ll let me take you out again?” Minkyung asks and Yebin thinks the tinge of hopefulness in her voice is just about the cutest thing in the universe.

“Of course," Yebin chews on her bottom lip, "but aren’t you busy?”

“I’ll make time for you.”

Yebin swoons. She feels her mind spin, air knocked out of her, and hears the ringing bells in her head, the sound of slot machines reverberating between her ears like ‘ _Jackpot! Jackpot!’_. But she keeps from staggering and collects herself.

She can’t embarrass herself in front of the girl she would hike mountains for. That'd be uncool. Minkyung called her _cool_ after all. So instead, Yebin raises her shoulders daringly.

“Then whenever you call for me, I’ll come running. Wherever you are. For real. Even if I'm in Ilsan.”

Minkyung lets out a chuckle and Yebin thinks she can even see a tinge of pink on the older girl’s already rosy cheeks too.

“I’ll be waiting,” Minkyung tells her.

**...**

Yebin’s castle in the air has floated close enough to the ground for her to reach. The path is of radiant golden rays, leading her right up to the grand entrance where Minkyung stands with an outstretched arm. It’s theatrical, as are all of her fantasies, but that’s because that’s all they were: unattainable pipe dreams. And Yebin constructed them as so.

But the pretty songbird that had her eyes turning into hearts all those months ago now stands in front of her, smiling for her and her only. Yebin knows this is just the beginning; she shouldn’t get ahead of herself.

But at least she now knows that perhaps, reality doesn’t have to be so disenchanting after all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh young first love..i have yet to experience lol  
> i have a cc (https://curiouscat.me/JINSOOKIST) if u wanna drop by and ask me any questions or say hello. we can be friends. thank u and i hope everyone has a happy new year!


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